Wit beyond measure is a man's greatest treasure

 

jr-abraxas:

ktnissevurdeen:

buttalecki:

what do you do at hogwarts if you start your period? 

like do you go and see madam promfrey? or your head of year? because i’m just trying to imagine the slytherin girls going snape and asking for tampons

image

I do not have the power within me to not reblog this. 

roachpatrol:

pardonmewhileipanic:

pardonmewhileipanic:

So I was looking at this terrible lingerie shop and….

bringing this back

she criticizes the taste of your meat for half an hour then storms off, it’s very erotic

daveyoufool:

So I saw this cute girl going down the street with an amazing ass. I was all “DAMN GIRL, YOU GOT AN AMAZING ASS.” She was like “thanks, there’s a sale across the block, I got him there.” Now I have a pet donkey too, he was five bucks and his name is Leopold. And he hates thunderstorms.

(Source: dave-youfool)

dekutree:

there’s this guy that looks just like will.i.am at my school and i whisper “let the beat rock” every time he passes me and he always just looks around trying to find who said it